The biggest things for me were:
- Why didn't I start my day with prayer? How did I forget?!
- Why was I ending my day and wondering what did I accomplish?
- Why didn't I get to the things I really wanted or needed to do?
- Why didn't my kids get around to doing the things I knew were best for them?
Days would go by.
Weeks would zoom by.
Months were disappearing in a snap of my finger.There was a mental list of things I thought that if I accomplished then it was a good day. If I didn't get to them, than it was not such a good day.
The deal was, I was fighting God's will for me and my family.
It was apparent that I needed to change a diaper (or 2!) or fold the laundry but I was doing this task lacking the much love that it needed and deserved. I was grudgingly doing these things. I was wishing that I was off doing something else. I believe St. Teresa said to 'find God in the pots and pans'. And that is so true. In my vocation to motherhood, though, I was not seeing it. I wanted to, oh, how my desire was to. BUT, I was kissing this boo-boo, disciplining this child, vacuuming when I should have been reading to my son, or answering my emails or phone eradically when I should have been playing w/ my 2 yr old b/c he wanted me to and on and on and on. Living in a reactive mode of parenting set me up for a disaster of sorts.
"Do small things with great love."
God bless your day,